Greetings Queen Marisa from Laura
and Henry in
Sydney, Australia
About six years ago my husband started asking me for various things in the bedroom. The best I can describe them would be that they were kinks.
He wanted to dive into some role play, where I took the reins as the dominant partner. He was keen to experience chastity, and after a bit of a hunt, we finally found a device that allowed me to keep him locked for one to two weeks at a time. To my surprise, I really enjoyed it—I loved the control it gave me and the noticeable changes I saw in him. Dildos and vibrators became our go-to for intimacy while he was locked up, and that role play kept evolving over the years.
Then, last year, he requested to watch me with a male escort. I gave it a go but decided against letting him watch. It was the first time since we got hitched that I had sex outside our marriage, and honestly, it was incredible. So incredible that it left me feeling a bit uneasy, and I ended up consulting a therapist. She suggested there was something wrong with me and that I needed to reset and hash things out. It was a struggle; how could I be the broken one? We’d built a life together over 16 years and had two kids! He encouraged my exploration, and it was bloody great! When I mentioned this to her, she told me she could no longer assist because I was deep into a BDSM subculture.
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Feeling adrift, I turned to Google, seeking information on my newfound delight in guiding Henry and the thrill I found with the escort. We delved into his past relationships and discovered that he had a cuckold fetish and a natural submissiveness to female partners. It was fascinating to unpack this, especially considering the strict upbringing he had with his mother. That’s when I stumbled upon Queen Marisa's books, which opened my eyes to the world of Female Led Relationships (FLR) and how to cultivate them. The ideas in those books resonated with me and helped me see that I’m not broken; while my desires may not follow the conventional path, they are entirely valid. I can embrace the joy of exploring experiences with an escort or another partner.
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Over the last 14 months, we’ve reshaped our relationship, home, and family life to embody a truly female-led structure. In doing so, Henry has become a more devoted husband, a committed partner, and a wonderful father to our kids. This shift started with implementing three key elements: full-time chastity, female-led worship and oral, and a deep respect for the Divine Feminine. It was as if Henry needed to embrace his submissive side while I stepped into the leadership role. He’s a smart, caring bloke, but he shines when he’s in a submissive position.
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By following the principles from the Love and Obey series, I’ve created an amazing and intimate female-led relationship with Henry—one that surpasses anything we had before. We established a clear FLR agreement, which has given me the freedom to explore other sexual partners for the physical satisfaction I crave—something Henry couldn’t provide—while he lavishes me with love, compassion, and support as my husband. There’s genuinely nothing like enjoying a lovely dinner with your partner and then snuggling up with him on the couch after spending time with my Bull. This empowered dynamic truly highlights the strength we women possess and what we can achieve. My confidence has skyrocketed, leading to promotions at work, while Henry has embraced his role, focusing on the well-being of our family while setting aside the patriarchal expectations he once held.
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I can’t see us stepping away from our Female Led Relationship. Was the journey easy? Not a chance. But for the bold woman willing to explore her own desires and understand her partner, the rewards are beyond worth it. Men, if you find yourself relating to this, consider buying your wife Love and Obey . Be brave enough to acknowledge your own desires. And ladies, if you’re reflecting on this, ask yourself why! Do you feel like something’s off in your relationship? Are you ready to take the lead and challenge the status quo? We make fantastic leaders! Embrace your strength and take control!
XX Queen Laura
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Greetings Queen Marisa from Michael and Susan from London, England
I was going to start by saying our FLR began about two years ago but in truth it probably began when Susan and I first started dating over five years ago, because I knew from the start that not only was she ‘the one for me’ but also that she was so much better than me in many respects.
At the time, she was busy studying to become a qualified accountant while I was just starting my career as a college lecturer. Her intelligence was a different breed altogether—more analytical and thorough. She possessed the remarkable ability to sum up a situation quickly and make decisions, whereas I could spend days or even weeks mulling over various options, only to struggle to reach a conclusion.
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Despite our differences, we shared many views about life and the world, which made us feel incredibly comfortable with each other. It didn’t take long before we decided to tie the knot and set up home together. Initially, we fell into the usual patriarchal model of a relationship, as that’s what society expected. Yet, I quickly recognised that, given her profession, it made sense for her to manage the family finances. Whenever we needed to bring in builders for some work on the house, it was usually Susan who coordinated everything. Still, when we filled out forms asking for the head of the household, we always put my name down. So we adhered to the conventional path, establishing a routine where she did most of the household chores, all while she advanced her career, while I worked long hours for only mediocre results.
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Susan always had a high sex drive, but in the early days, that wasn’t an issue because, being a young man in love, my drive was pretty strong too. Once she qualified and we felt financially secure, we decided to start a family, and within a couple of years, we welcomed two happy, healthy babies. It was after the birth of our second child that Susan went through a tough phase of depression, during which the physical aspect of our marriage almost vanished. I tried to understand her struggles and took on more household tasks, giving her the space she needed to regain her spirits. It was during this time that my own libido took a nosedive.
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Eventually, Susan emerged from her depression, only to find that her sex drive had revamped and intensified. I found it increasingly difficult to keep up with her, and for several months, tensions grew between us. She became irritable and impatient with my tendency to procrastinate, and in hindsight, I think sexual frustration played a significant role in that dynamic. Around this time, one of her friends lent her a couple of Marisa Rudder's books, Love and Obey and Real Men Worship Women, which profoundly impacted her thinking and, soon after, our relationship.
She asked me to read them, too, and expressed a desire to discuss the concepts presented by Ms. Rudder. It seemed to provide her with a framework to examine her views on female superiority and how embracing it could transform our relationship into something both of us would find more fulfilling. I’ve always acknowledged that Susan excels in areas where I don’t, particularly when it comes to management and organisation. Recognising her unhappiness and frustration, I agreed to explore the idea of a Female Led Relationship.
We didn’t overhaul everything overnight, but gradually we began to introduce elements of a FLR, with the foundational principle being her taking the lead and prioritising her happiness for a change. As the saying goes, “Happy Wife, Happy Life.”
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We started by redistributing household responsibilities. Since Susan had more earning potential if she could devote more time to her job, I volunteered to manage most household tasks while we split childcare duties evenly. With her knack for organisation, she created a weekly chore schedule, and I was primarily responsible for carrying it out, while she would check in for updates and send reminders. I felt a bit like a servant at times, but I couldn’t deny that things ran much more smoothly.
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With the household and childcare logistics settled, Susan next focused on our sexual relationship. I’d been dreading this conversation, fearing I wasn’t providing her with enough pleasure. However, the suggestion she made took me by surprise: she wanted the freedom to see other partners. I won’t lie; I was initially distraught, thinking this could spell trouble for us. But she reassured me that this wasn’t a step towards separation and that she simply craved more than I could offer. I began to wonder if this was what the FLR was all about, despite the fact that the idea wasn’t explicitly mentioned in the books we’d read—Marisa Rudder’s Cuckolding hadn’t been published yet.
Before I could protest too much, she insisted that this idea aligned perfectly with prioritising her happiness. After all, there was no point in ignoring the need; better to confront it head-on and deal with it maturely. Eventually, she convinced me that exploring this aspect could enhance her gratification while potentially boosting my own libido through a bit of competition. Reluctantly but ultimately on board, I realised it wouldn’t be fair to deny her what she clearly needed to find joy.
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Over the following months, Susan dated several men—some from dating sites, others through work connections. Although my pride took a hit initially, I could see how much she enjoyed the attention and how beneficial it was for her. I wasn ’t certain if it was the sex itself or the thrill of flirting and anticipation before her dates, but her confidence soared. She became increasingly comfortable with her leadership role in our relationship, something she insisted was paramount to her happiness. I could only stand by and admire her growth. Nevertheless, my traditional upbringing still caused pangs of jealousy, particularly when she began a more serious relationship with another boyfriend about a year ago.
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Then, in early summer, Marisa Rudder released her book on Cuckolding , which we both eagerly read. It taught me a great deal, including the idea that cuckolding is more common than I’d realised and that many couples are drawn to that lifestyle. When handled properly, it could actually strengthen marriages by recognising and supporting a wife’s sexual needs. After finishing the book, it felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I finally felt able to relax and accept our new situation. With the pressure to “perform” taken off me, I could focus on ensuring Susan was happy and fulfilled, which ultimately made our sexual relationship more mutually satisfying.
To aid this new dynamic, Susan suggested I read another of Ms. Rudder’s books titled Oral Sex for Women . I found it incredibly eye-opening, as it highlighted how little I truly knew about women’s anatomy and desires—despite being a father to two children! Thankfully, Susan was more than willing to give me plenty of chances to hone my skills in this area.
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So, how has our Female Led Relationship panned out? I’ve come to understand that my happiness is intrinsically linked to Susan’s. Having her take the lead has brought us both a greater sense of contentment. I recognise her superiority in many ways, making it sensible for her to be the decision-maker. As for the idea of cuckolding, I’ve come across discussions online suggesting that if one partner is allowed to have sexual freedom, the other should have the same. Yet, I’ve never felt the desire for other women. I can’t speak for every couple, but I know that Susan’s drive exceeds mine significantly, and while she provides me with all the pleasure I need, she craves more stimulation than I can offer.
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Thus, if one can shed old conventional thinking, cucumbering can offer a feasible and healthy solution to the disparity in libido between husband and wife. In any case, it has undeniably made our sex life far more interesting. Susan was right; my own sex drive has increased thanks to a bit of competition. She once joked that I should treat her like a goddess and consider her vulva a temple where more than one can worship. I think that encapsulates my perspective these days perfectly.
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Thank you for everything,
Michael & Susan
Greetings Queen Marisa from
Istanbul, Turkey
We are a couple. He is, Ilyas, 45 years old and I am, Fulya, 35 years old. From the first day we met, there was always a power struggle between Ilyas and I. Before we met, we were both dominant characters in our separate lives, and in the beginning of our relationship we were constantly fighting and struggling to see who would be in charge.
I discovered your books online and ordered Love & Obey and Real Men Worship Women . After reading Love & Obey, I finally had the courage to tell Ilyas that our constant fighting and power struggle couldn't continue. I expressed my desire to live in a female-led relationship and told him he needed to abandon his dominant attitude. I encouraged Ilyas to read Real Men Worship Women , and once he did, it opened his mind to a new way of living.
I made it clear that he must recognize me as his superior and submit to my authority. He embraced his submission because he loved me and didn’t want to lose me. From that moment on, I took control of our relationship. He stopped arguing or disobeying my commands, and today, he follows my orders without question. Occasionally, when he disrespects or disobeys me, I’ve begun to discipline him. He faces consequences whenever his behavior falls short of my expectations. After reading your book Spanking , I learned how to properly discipline men. Sometimes, the punishments can be quite intense since I’m physically stronger than he is. But trust me, whenever he receives a serious punishment, it’s well-deserved.
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We don’t view the Love & Obey way of life as a fantasy. With your new book, Turning Point , I’ve taken full responsibility in all areas of our lives, and he is now my obedient male servant. He even left his job at my request because I wanted him to focus on serving me and taking care of our home. He handles all the housework.Since reading your book on cuckolding, I’ve started to cuckold Ilyas as well. I have a rich, dominant lover (whom we affectionately call the Bull). He helps fulfill our financial needs and, of course, my desire for luxury. I’m now successfully employed at my lover’s company, where he pays me quite well. All responsibilities—like paying the bills—are now mine. Ilyas is also quite content; he says he feels relieved from the burden of responsibility. I have sex with him rarely, but he doesn’t complain. Ilyas is exceptional when it comes to oral sex, so that’s the only intimacy we share now. My penetrative encounters are exclusive to my Bull.
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Our relationship has advanced significantly in this female-led lifestyle. I encourage anyone new to read through your entire series on female-led relationships and to experience this lifestyle for some time before aspiring to reach the level of fulfillment we enjoy. I can confidently say that your Love & Obey Female Led Relationship Book Series are the “sacred texts” of this way of life. Some people embrace our lifestyle, while others vehemently disagree, but Ilyas and I are both genuinely happy. I am his superior, and he knows it—he takes comfort in my loving authority over him and his role in my life as my devoted servant.
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Thank you, Queen Marisa, for guiding us on this path.
Fulya (and Ilyas)
Greetings from Norway from Oddmund and Hanne
We have been married for 25 years in a typical male-led marriage, now we have switched to a Female Led Marriage.
I’ve been practicing martial arts for many years and working in the security industry, but now I’ve found my way into a female-led marriage. Most people who know me would describe me as an Alpha male, a leader in both my social circle and my work. Yet, deep down, I’ve always had submissive feelings towards all women, particularly when it comes to my wife, Hanne.
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Just over a year ago, I finally admitted to myself—and to Hanne—that I truly want to submit to her completely. After some searching online, I stumbled upon an impressive video channel dedicated to female-led relationships. It was Queen Marisa Rudder’s channel, the founder of the Love and Obey movement, and her 14 books offered incredible guidance on the subject. Through her videos and writings, I was inspired to start treating my wife like the Queen she is, and I began to worship, serve, and obey her in a way I had always dreamed of.
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I also want to express my gratitude to Queen Marisa for the invaluable advice she provided me through email. Her words were a lifeline for an inexperienced husband yearning to be the best submissive for my dominant wife. The more I read about female-led relationships in Marisa’s books, the more I realised this is what I had been missing. An FLR truly is the optimal arrangement for both partners.
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I began by asking Hanne for permission to do things and took on all the housework she would allow me to handle. Initially, she seemed taken aback when I asked for permission just to lick her or to give her foot massages. Before this, we had a typical male-dominated marriage where she would only let me care for her when I felt like it. Though I’ve had strong submissive feelings since we were newlyweds, I had buried them for years, trying to live up to the expectation that I had to be the boss in both our daily lives and our intimate moments.
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As I started to embrace my submissive side, allowing my inner desires to surface, a gradual transformation began in our relationship. Within weeks of both reading Marisa’s Love and Obey , Real Men Worship Women , and her books on chastity and cuckolding, not only did I change, but so did Hanne. She had once been more submissive, but suddenly, she began to take on a dominant and commanding role. By Christmas, I felt more like her loving, submissive husband. I no longer needed to prove my submission; it came naturally, and she frequently took on the role of disciplining and correcting me, both at home and even in public.
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I’ll never forget the first time she corrected me while we were out Christmas shopping, playfully smacking my bottom in the store. Some other young ladies nearby stifled their giggles when they noticed how I immediately bowed my head and followed behind her. Hanne laughed when she saw my bright red face and the growing bulge in my trousers; in that moment, my heart swelled with happiness, and my submissive feelings only intensified.
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In the months following Christmas, we’ve experienced an exhilarating ride—a blend of strong emotions and occasional humiliation as I’ve navigated my male ego and the demands of a female-led marriage. Today, I have no doubt that Hanne is the boss, and I am her obedient, submissive husband. My behavior has changed around all the women in our social circle as well. I used to initiate discussions, but now I allow myself to be corrected and put in my place by Hanne and other ladies.
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At home, Queen Hanne manages everything: the household, our finances, and our day-to-day lives. I handle the dishes and keep the place tidy, following the tasks she assigns me. There’s something incredibly exciting about her dominance. She has become so powerfully alluring; I find myself wanting her constantly. Now, she can just place her foot in my lap and tell me to take care of myself, and I’ll be ready in no time. Moreover, I’ve developed a strong desire to give her oral pleasure, although during our regular intercourse, I often faced premature ejaculation.
While I prefer to keep her to myself, it quickly became apparent that she deserves more than I can provide on my own. So, in the spring of 2022, I confessed to her that I would fully respect her wishes, even if she chose to have another man for sex. I even learned that she had turned down an offer from someone. Initially, she was against the idea of bringing other men into our lives and didn’t want to cuckold me. I viewed cuckolding as something she should do only if she felt inclined, and I would see it as an honour. Once she started cuckolding me, I began to enjoy cleaning her afterwards after her encounters, simply because I loved her so much and wanted her to experience all the pleasure she deserved.
With that said, I started to struggle with my overwhelming desire for her to cuckold me, which only deepened due to her dominance over me. I found myself changing my underwear multiple times a day because I was leaking. Laundry became one of the few chores Hanne refused to let me manage because she didn’t trust me to do it properly. One day, she confronted me and asked why I was tossing five or six pairs of boxers into the wash each day.
With humility, I admitted that I was leaking due to my intense desire for her. She had also noticed times when I’d ejaculated in bed without laying a finger on myself while I was pleasuring her.
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The next day, Hanne came to me with a smirk, a hint of seriousness in her tone. “Since you leak as much as a little slut, I’ve decided, Oddmund, that from now on, you’ll wear feminine sanitary pads during the day.” From that moment on, I noticed a profound change in her demeanor. She became much more dominant and even started flirting with other men right before my eyes.
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One of her long-time male friends, Ronny, has always had a flirtatious rapport with Hanne. One afternoon, she told me she was going out for dinner with him after work. My heart raced, but I managed to smile and encourage her to enjoy herself. That evening, as I waited for her return, I felt a mix of nerves and excitement. When Hanne came home, I was invited to pleasure her right away. I could tell she was incredibly aroused and asked her what they did during their dinner date. She claimed they hadn’t crossed any physical boundaries, but I could sense the evidence of her excitement.
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Later, Hanne admitted Ronny had offered her a massage. When I questioned her about it, she simply confirmed that was the reason she returned home so worked up. At that point, I didn’t dare push for more details, but it became clear that their meetings had escalated; now they trained and had intimate encounters together regularly.
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Initially, I tried to enforce a rule that their trysts should only happen in his apartment. But one day, when I returned home, I found his car parked in our driveway. A note was taped to the door instructing me to go directly to the kitchen and clean up the mess she and Ronny had made before my arrival. It also told me to go straight to bed and to stay away from the guest room. As I walked past the guest room, I froze at the sounds of Hanne’s moans of ecstasy, knowing she was having an exceptional time with Ronny. I hurried to the kitchen to tidy up, then went to bed as ordered.
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A few hours later, Hanne came into our bedroom, knelt beside me, and looked me straight in the eyes. “After our previous conversation about rules regarding where I can have sex with Ronny, I told him what you said. He asked me, ‘So it’s still Oddmund who decides at your house?’ That’s why I decided to show both you and Ronny that I’m the one in charge here. By letting Ronny have his way with me in the guest room tonight, I’m clearly demonstrating I can do whatever I please.”
I bowed my head in submission and asked, “May I please worship you, Queen Hanne?” She nodded, and I latched onto her with a fresh intensity, cleaning her with all the tenderness and devotion I could muster. From that moment, there was no turning back; we reached a pivotal point in our marriage.
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Hanne also has a dear friend, Kari, whom she’s known since high school. Kari, who identifies as a lesbian, often spends nights with Hanne, while I’m relegated to the guest room or assigned chores at Kari’s place.
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Though Hanne is most frequently with Ronny, it was an intense experience to witness my wife and her close friend Kari embracing their intimacy in our home, granting me the role of submissive helper. I was instructed to stay in Kari’s apartment for an entire weekend, with the caveat that only if Kari was satisfied with my cleaning and laundry would I be allowed to pleasure Hanne.
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When I arrived at Kari’s, she cheekily claimed that Hanne had instructed her to lock me in a chastity cage. The thought made me so aroused that Kari had to give me a few slaps to manage my excitement before fitting me into the device. It was my first experience with such a contraption, leaving me feeling incredibly vulnerable and under another woman’s control. Despite being a lesbian, Kari exudes an irresistible allure that makes me feel weak in her presence. As she secured the cage, she hinted that in the coming weeks, I would have an opportunity to earn my satisfaction with Hanne.
With fervour, I cleaned Kari’s apartment as if my life depended on it. Since then, both Queen Hanne and Kari have spent many weekends together while I dutifully serviced the household. My relationship with Kari, which was once contentious—initially fraught with arguments due to my male chau vinistic tendencies—has completely transformed. Now I willingly submit to her as the dominant woman she is, a friend of my wife.
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I'll never forget the first time I walked into our living room and saw Hanne trembling with pleasure as Kari serviced her. I found myself sitting in the corner, engulfed in a mix of lust and admiration, aware that Kari had completely taken charge of my wife. She has always been an Alpha friend to Hanne, and my former conflicts with her have dissolved. After witnessing how Kari dominated Hanne, I became submissive to both her and my wife. Anything else would seem pathetic; it was clear that being obedient and humbly submissive was my place now.
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Hanne has clearly communicated that my sole chance to earn back any privileges—to be allowed intimate moments with her—depends on my submission and the tasks she assigns to me. The dynamic has shifted completely, and I embraced my role wholeheartedly. My journey into this female-led life has taught me to balance my ego and desires in a way that elevates both Hanne and Kari, embracing my role as the submissive husband.
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Now, I understand that this lifestyle, rooted in mutual respect and power dynamics, has opened a pathway to a more profound relationship. I never expected to find joy in seeing my wife with another man or embracing the dominant presence of her female friends, but it has brought us closer and fostered an environment of trust and security. I am proud to be her obedient husband, fulfilled in my role, and grateful for the journey that has led us here.
Thank you, Queen Marisa, for paving the way and providing the wisdom that has transformed our lives.
Yours in submission,
Oddmund